February 10, 2013

It’s one thing watching American Horror Story. And it’s a whole ‘nother thing watching American Horror Story with your boyfriend.

I tapped my almost obvious passcode to my iPad and opened up Season 2 of American Horror Story. The third episode came on and I handed the left side of the earphones to him.

I was thinking about APUSH and I quickly glanced at the iPad screen, watching the poor boy scream in terror.

I sighed and looked at my APUSH book. I turned a page over, and then another, and then another. And then I realized that there was no point in doing it if I couldn’t even concentrate, so I rested my head on his shoulder.

I looked up at him. I wasn’t quite sure if he was actually interested in rewatching the episode again or if he was just thinking about something else, but his eyes were glued to the screen. He is so perfect, I thought. He is so amazing. I don’t deserve him…

And then I heard more screams and frightened yelps. I looked back on the screen, and the scene just scared me.

So I blatantly stated, “This is scaring me.”

He looked at me. “How?”

“I don’t know. It just is.”

This moment was so small, yet I realized that not everyone was scared of the same things. Sure, he may have seen this episode before, but I doubt it scared him then. I was scared of the whole exorcism process going on at the moment, but I was also scared of corners, spiders, clowns, dolls, and most of all, breaking up with him.

I wondered if he ever thought about breaking up with me, or vice versa, And I wondered if it scared him as much as it scared me.

I prayed that that time would never ever come. And I rested my head on his shoulder once more.